頭が。。。塞がった。。。

Hey there guys, it seemed like my blog kinda got stuck. I was actually planning to update on the Longhouse Trip that I went for, with the beautiful waterfalls and all..... But I don't know what actually happened to me, but I lost my ability to write.

My posts seem to get more and more boring, and I don't know what is it I'm missing.... that made me lose my ability to express...... my head recently..... is just blocked..... like a mental block.

Heh, I guess the Longhouse story will have to wait a bit..... for the meantime, I'll post about something else.

*************

Recently, I've been having mental blocks once in a while, it's feels like constipation, you know.... like there's so much in there, but it can't come out. But then again, you don't know WHAT's in there..... other than crap....

Recently also, I saw my cards..... lying in my drawer.... sitting together with my Add-Math II papers, which I haven't touched since last semester after my Math exam...... same goes for my cards..... I've barely touched them, and they're getting old..... new but old.....

And then it dawned on me. I've used more than hundreds of bucks on my cards; more than hours and weeks and month's of practice; and cramped my fingers countless times trying to do weird feats like card throwing and flipping and everything. Yet, am I going to give up on them? Right here, right now?

"Learn to Amaze", that was the word that captivated me. "That was it!" I thought, when I saw that phrase. "That was what I needed..." was all I knew. Then came another phrase "Magic Beyond Belief". That was it, I took it up, gave in my time, my effort, my heart, my trust.


What do YOU know about magic?


In today's world, magic proves to be solely for entertainment purpose I guess...... people today, they forget, they never realise.... how someone could jump from a plane without a parachute and not die; how someone could disappear behind a piece of cloth and appear in hawaii; how a hungry beggar could pull a hamburger out of Mc D's driveby menu; and even how magicians manage to turn back time..... just by the snap of their fingers.....

Then again, today's society think that magic is all tricks, that it is all lies, that all you need to know is "the Secret". Sorry to say, but that isn't it. Magic isn't a trick, it isn't a lie, and EVEN if you know "the Secret", you don't know Magic.

I myself believe, not everyone can learn magic. It's neither for the weak nor faint, nor the idiotic and lazy, nor the bone-breaking hardworking or Albert Einsteins'. It is for those who have the heart, not to learn, not to dedicate, but to Believe.



Okay, enough talk about the background of magic. K, I saw my cards, I remember what I used to do, what I used to like.... now what? I realised that I'd nearly forgotten what I used to love, what I used to feel like when performing, the sigh of relief and joy when seeing the word "Amazed" on the other's face.

What stopped me, what's holding me back, I don't know really...... but each time I see my cards, my heart hurts, my head hurts. Will I turn back time.....? (Same goes for my piano.... but that's another story)



まあ　まあ。。。。
人生に、　問題実に沢山いるよ。
俺何を待ち受けて？　自分も解かんね。
けど、段段に。。。　そろそろに。。。

時間が未だある。


じゃあ、　今日はここまで。