2 weeks into December

So... it's 7:30 in the morning... and why am I awake?? Because I got "put aeroplane" for my morning training for Mt. Kinabalu session. And I'm pissed!... ... Okay... maybe I'm not, thanks to years of training from my classmates where half of them are good "pilots". And I wouldn't wanna go back to sleep after trying so hard to wake up at 6:00 in the morning would I??

**put aeroplane, translated literally from 放飞机 in chinese, which in chinese... is used when someone decides to say "Hey! Sorry, I can't make it, you guys will have to do without me~ =)" sort of thing.


It's past week 2 for December.... and slowly, things are picking up it's pace.... And life have been starting to get 'meaningful' (whatever meaningful means to you, hehe).

They're 2 simple things that make life fun and meaningful for me.
One, Games... with friends of course.
Two, Friends... with food and drinks =)



So I've been trying out the new game Left 4 Dead 2 a couple of times with my friends~!! And find it just as good/bad... as its prequel.

Gameplay is overall the same if you've played Left 4 Dead.... What this part 2 gives you is a couple of fine new weapons and zombies ^^ Zombies look much cooler in part 2, with much more variety of clothing and funny faces, haha, yea... I like to pay attention to the funny detail. The Computer controlled zombies are much more cleverer this time too~~

So I wasn't planning to write a full review on it. You wanna know what this new game is like? Let's meet at Cyber X and we'll show you how it's like, haha.


On to the 2nd fun and meaningful things in life, I've been hanging out with friends lately... in the morning... for jogging, always followed up by a nice and filling yam cha somewhere nearby. I won't be posting photos of this yet, since I decided to upload them all up along AFTER I finished my Mt. Kinabalu trip.

Yesterday though, we had a casual outing and my first attempt at a photoshooting session T.T

To be honest, I learned it ain't easy having a shoot with people as subjects, haha. Especially the setting, make-up, poses, design and stuff. I'm more into... shooting natural stuff without having to set-up or pose or choose a spot especially for the photo. But anyway~~~ For my first photoshoot, I'm somewhat satisfied with the results ^^ although there's many places I realised I could've done better when post-producing the photos.

Lot's of OOF (Out of Focus) and undefined subjects... busy background and stuff. But hey.... it's okay I guess.... considering it's not even a year I've started photography yet, hehe. My camera isn't even a year old yet ^^

There weren't many pictures that managed to pass through my 'filtering process', but to view all the pics anyway... they're in my Facebook Album.




My favourite photo for the day:

Sorry Jo. I seriously like this one. Haha~

Do People Change?

To give you the answer straight up. I, personally, Yes, I do believe people change. As to why? I don't know, and I don't think I'll ever know. For the Better, for the Worse, who knows?


Anyway, this question popped into my mind today as I met a friend today.


A friend whom I didn't meet for 7 years. I knew him in my first year of Secondary School. I didn't actually know him well, and to be honest, my impression of him wasn't good. As far as I know, he was a big talker, and not many of the people I knew liked him. I didn't talk to him much, I never really wanted to either, since I already didn't have a good impression of him.

Yet, as time went on, and each of us walked our own lives. People forget. All these previous 'impressions' I had of him, someone, or anyone, slowly start fading. And given enough time, I think it could fade to a point where everything starts from zero. (There are, I believe however.... 'exceptions'.... you could call them)

After years of not meeting, years of not hearing any news about him, today, by chance, I met him on the street.

Oddly though, throughout the many years we did not meet or talk, we recognized each other, and what was even weirder was that we talked as if we once were good friends. As I talked to him, even though it was just for that 3 minutes, I felt that, he might be a different person, maybe, just maybe... changed from the one I knew before... I didn't have time to chat for long, and neither did he, so we just caught up a little with each other and moved on with our lives. But still, just that few seconds, made me wonder... had he changed or what?

It's all just a Paper-thin line apart

Yes and No. In and Out. Here and There. To Be or Not to Be. Right and Wrong. Truth and Falsity. Life and Death. What separates each from the other, is all just a paper-thin line.


I knew this all along, but not until Yesterday, did it actually dawn upon me that everything actually followed this 1 or 0 rule.


All along in my exams in Uni so far. I've never failed a subject. Nor do I plan to ~.~ (who does, well, maybe some do). But yesterday. I came across a subject so hard, *okay, it wasn't actually THAT hard, but the fact that I NEVER listened to lectures or studied it AT ALL before this made it so*, that I was almost willing to give it up. Yet, my conscience and ego took over, and I forced myself to study through the midnight before the exam.

So after I finished my paper yesterday. Though I don't think I did well, but I think that I somewhat managed to scrape through and pass. But since the results aren't out, I can't say for sure.


However, soon, I got word from a friend taking the same subject. And the person told me, that all she hopes for right now is for a Supplementary Exam. At that moment, I felt regret, and guilt, for not asking her to study more, for not telling her to stop playing around. I always thought that it would be fine, that it should be fine. I was wrong.

Pass or Fail. Only then did I realise, failure was just an inch away from passing. Even though we might not realise it, but it's always lingering around the corners, waiting for us to make a wrong move, waiting us to fall into the wrong temptation. I never knew it was so close by.... and I never had the thought of it actually happening, to me, or to my friends.

I'm lucky that I pushed myself to study even though it really felt like hell during those hours.... .... in the middle of the night, with no food, not enough sleep (due to a 3 day combo of exams, this was the 3rd). I felt like a living zombie at 6 in the morning. While some who fell into the trap and didn't manage to fight back, lost themselves, and ended up on the other side of that paper-thin margin.


But from now on, I guess I'll be more aware of that paper-thin margin. That separates one from the other.
And that the choice, is Ours to make.

Some, however... are less fortunate to make that choice. But that's a whole new topic to talk about when the time comes.

Where am I?

**Goes well with this song, load song 1st, then listen and read ^_^**




Stepping out of the door today as the first day of my 4th sem in Miri, things began with a slightly different feeling to it. Everything seemed.... like it wasn't quite there yet. The road that led to the everyday bus stop I used to take seemed so quiet... And just waiting for the bus seemed long enough to make me tired.


The canteen that I ate at every morning while here for 2 years seemed so unfamiliar altogether. I couldn't decide what to eat; I couldn't decide where to sit; I couldn't see where I was going, where I should go, what I should do; because everything I did wouldn't make me feel any better.


I went to the atm to check my balance: I went to check the notice boards for new notices; I went to the bookshop to check the book prices; I went to the computer labs for the aircon; I went to the toilet for no reason whatsoever. Yet, the places I could go to were limited...


Sitting in such a crowd, yet feeling like there was no one else, it was something so frightening, something that made me feel so frighteningly alone, and it was so much more than what's seen on the outside.

30 minutes I spent with a plate of full moon toast felt like a never ending plate of food. Taking out my phone and placing it on the table only seemed to make things look slightly better, but my relief ended when the canteen worker had to take away my one and only empty plate on my table... leaving me... .... empty...


Everything felt so unreal.... like it couldn't be happening.... like it shouldn't be happening.


Where am I? Why am I here?



As a friend, I have to admit that,

I miss you.
Hope you're doing fine out there without me.

5 Years From Now

Life in Miri has been somewhat boring so far..... though things DO happen once in a while.... like people killing people, people robbing people.... and what more...... I have no idea right now.

But 5 years from now..... things might be very different for every each and every one of us.






One day.... you might just walk past and see:

That your friends aren't the way they used to be....

And some change in turn to reveal a different side of them, something less seen by the common.

Some friends get what they've always craved for.....

And so you work hard...... and you get this too:

But wait...

Some managed to get on "Bigger" places, by trying the things they always wished to do.

While some are inspired to inspire others.

And some... ...... ...... turn into exhibition pieces.




But then again..... you look around....







And all of the sudden...







You come to find out that

It's all....

Just around the corner.





five years from now

Intermission Break

*Quite a long post ahead* or is it the pictures that make it seem long......

While I was planning to finish my updates about KL as fast as possible, the last 2 weeks of my stay in KK had other plans for me instead..... to keep me away from my blog.

So..... I've been busy with quite some stuff the last week........... namely.... visiting Tshung Tsin during it's Sports Meet.... gone to a House Warming Party.... planned and went to Pulau Manukan... and watched 3 movies at the cinemas.

It's such a nostalgic scene going back to school and see that though some things have changed... it reminds you of what it was like years before.......

The sports meet this year...... of course, was just like it was years before.... Besides the fact that it only consists of 5 houses (compared to the previous 7)...

And Nature didn't seem to have mercy on this year's students

Digiman Mr.Yee looks like he was fully equipped for the weather.



Oh... God spare the maids and kakak's of these children....

Who's next to jump?



Mr Lai was still in Business



And the school still duped our money by inviting this uneccessary animal

Nevertheless....... going back to TTSS always reminds you of the 6 years you spent there....... seeing

This!! reminds me of how irritating the 'after-recess' bell sounded till we were forced to 'silence' it..... (let's have a closer look)

See that white disgusting thingy?..... that's chewing gum.... Though it's pretty much hardened by now.... but the bell definitely isn't as loud and annoying as it once was

This.... reminds you about the 'Leong fun susu' that cost us only RM1. (It's 1.50 now... and taste a lot worse....)

This.... reminds you of the days and nights we spent 2 years ago doing the same things........

And THIS! Reminds us of our glorious moments back then........







Moving on..... the next day's night..... we had good food and fun at Pheobe's House Warming!! Thanks Pheobe.

Then came our pulau trip again.... organized by those who didn't make it last time, haha.

There weren't many people... only 7, but we had fun ^^

We tried the banana boat......

Everybody was so happy!

While Shaun was over-excited about it and.............. .................

You get quite a scene, hahaha.....

Then we tried the Jetski..... which was NOT how easy I expected it to be...... it's like riding a bike... but on water......

The instructor was supposed to sit behind..... and what happens when he sits in front is.......

BUSSH!!!!!

Later when we were back on the beach......

Shaun tries his luck


As the next James Bond.........

Feeding the fish can be fun........ when you try to do it in 'exotic' ways..... like

Hahaha.......



Well, that's all for now....... I thought I wanted to review about the 3 movies I watched, but..... I thought I didn't want to overdo my blog post. Btw, the 3 movies were "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button", "Pink Panther 2", and "Valkyrie"..... all which were pretty good movies I would say.

So long.

As we grow older...

This post might be a bit odd as my first actual post coming back to KK, but anyway....

Once again, I couldn't sleep. My mind just seems to be to active at the wrong times of the day, so I ended up here again, typing my thoughts into this computer, and up onto my blog, which I didn't really want to at first, cause I felt it was a little awkward, but anyway, here it is....

---------
1 week... I've been back for slightly more than a week. Yet all too soon, I've already felt.... something that I didn't want to. Even if it's just a week, I felt that somehow..... with my friends.... everyone... each other.... have somehow started to grow apart.

I remember back in high school, there were times, when all of us would know what Steam would buy for breakfast; what Amos's math marks were; what was CKCham's favourite phrase of the day; what was the height of our classmates; where the girls would usually sit and eat; what would be the topic for that day..... and so on.....

Yet now, even as we talk to each other, there's so many things that we don't know anymore. As we live in different parts of the world, as we busy ourselves with our own business these days, even with the best technology in this world.... it seems we're all slowly growing apart.


As we grow older, there will be things.... that will naturally disappear.... Things that we no longer have to do, while other things that we will start to do; there will be more and more troublesome things, things that we just wave off with a sentace of "I'm busy", or "that's a waste of time", or "we'll do that next time", or some sort.....

In another few years.... we might not ever be able to do the same things we could do last time.... or even now....

And all those worthless things we did, the stupid quarrels we had, all the time we had together.... now turning into memories.... precious memories..... I really never would've thought it would be like this back then.
----------

end

reminiscence

Everytime I realise that I haven't actually touched much of my books to be ready for exam, I'm "Oh great.... and I thought exams were quite a long way more to go....". Turns out I've got another 4 days in between before I do my first subject (excluding today)


Miri's weather is so unpredictable, one day you could get

Figure 1. Strong winds, heavy clouds

Strong winds that take the roofs off the bus stops, bring down 40 year old trees, and those that blow your just dried pantees to god-knows-where......

And as a compensation, you get this, the very next day

Figure 2. My bed....


Figure 3. My room.....

The blazing oven heat coming in from my window makes sure I can't sleep in the afternoon, so that I can use that time to study Management 100. But what the hell!?? Who can study in such heat???


The heat + the frustration + the oh-for-God's-sake + the I-don't-give-a-damn in me always came down to one thing..... Closing the window, turning on the Air-con, and going to sleep.


I really felt kinda hopeless these days.... hoping that I didn't have to study, hoping that I was better, hoping that I could go back to KK and enjoy myself...... but that very last thought..... of going back to KK, opened the door.....

Today, when the barbequeing sun was crawling back to its homes in preparation for night, I watched the sunset.... it reminded me of my times back in KK, it reminded me of the sunset I loved at the Sports Complex; it reminded me of the Sunrise I watched while everyone else was asleep during our trips; I remembered the fun I had back with my friends.... and how much I longed to go back just to have more fun with them.

As I watched the clouds part, the flaming red melting into purple..... more and more memories came back.... and out of the blue..... I realised..... that there was still hope.... there was still so much more waiting....

And then I thought, I should get back to studying.... I don't wanna get hauled back for a supplementary test while I'm back there in KK busy creating more memories..... but this time.... even with the heat, even with the frustrations..... just by thinking of what's there to come...... it all seemed so tiny in front of those thoughts......


Miss all of you RENs, waiting to see all of you soon....... soon..... very soon.....

Part 2, Too Busy... too Hectic...

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//............PART II...........//
//------------------------------//
// Warning: LONG post again.... //
//////////////////////////////////

Well, as I promised, here's part two for you guys. Though it was a little later than I planned, but anyway, it's better than no update isn't it?? ^_^


Picking up where I left off, was last last friday (last last.... is there such a word, I doubt that). After a couple of tiring days fussing around with meetings and preparations, and not to mention, classes, came Saturday, where I spent Half of my time awake being in Bintang Plaza, 'surveying' the area and planning the next day's fundraising.


Sunday, sorry, but I didn't manage to take any picture on the Fundraising, but I don't suppose any of you are interested in seeing pics of it anyway, are you?.... If you are, neee.... nothing much happened, we were just having a fundraising in Miri's Bintang Plaza for the Palliative Care Association, which is an association which....... .................... ............... .......... treats??...... patients in serious and critical?... diseases......??? omg.... I wonder how I actually collected donations without knowing who we're collecting for.... I hope it's correct.

Anyway, there were booths for games, and I was one of the so-called booths. And we had someone from our uni from another club, who was a TAROT reader..... "to read your past, present and future, with just a pick of a couple of cards, he could reveal everything that lies before, after, and upon your days to come. " "Come, come, come!! RM2 per question, RM5 for THREE questions!!" "You get to ask about ANYthing, yes anything, your social life, your future, your education, your parents, your loved one, your love life, even how you're gonna be going on with your partner now!"

Okay.... got a bit carried away probably. Anyway, I usually don't believe this kind of stuff, but somehow, all my other friends said he's accurate, and sooooooooOOOoo accurate, that I COULDn't NOT give it a try. And so.....



No, I'm not gonna tell you the details.

But anyway, I guess it really IS a wonder how Tarot works. He shuffles the cards, you pick a couple of cards, depending on what kind of question you ask. The cards are turned over, and from there, he sees what kind of person are you, or whatever answer to the question you asked. I'll have to say, it's not On-the-Dot, but nevertheless, it's good enough for ME (someone I'd say is rather hard to convince), to wonder what lies behind the secret of Tarot.

Ee.... 2 paragraph's on tarot alone.... I guess I'd better get along with the other stuff.... so....

Ah!!, haha, I manage to steal one pic from facebook on the Bintang Fundraising.

Figure 1. Bintang Fundraising Stage Backdrop

O-k-a-y..... I guess..... that should be enough about the Fundraising, since nothing REALLY.... interesting happened, there were dance performances and a magic show, other than that..... yah, I guess that's about it.

And That was Sunday......... There went my weekend Saturday and Sunday.... and also my Friday which I'm proud of because I didn't have any classes on Friday.


Mondays...... the Gloomy Mondays..... oh? or wasn't it supposed to be Sunday...... Maah, whatever. Gloomy Monday came, I totally forgot to prepare for my Labs and Management tutorials (which were always a hassle) beforehand because I was kinda tired after the fundraising.

OH SHYT!! I almost forgot! Sunday Night!! AFTER the fundraising........ came this:

Figure 2. Our Steamboat.....

STEAMBOAT...... After a long day of work......... I came home......... and I still had to wait for the food to boil in the pot, haha. Sorry, not that I'm complaining....... but I was a bit hungry at that time. But man....... what a dinner.

Figure 2. Food, and Ung Chai with itchy tongue....
or probably he ate something spicy.

The food was...... really.... "Feng Fu".... omg, what happened to my english, how do you say "feng fu" in English again. Anyhow, we really enjoyed the dinner, eating with friends, it kinda gives you a different feeling, haha.

Next came, well, it was mooncake festival, so you know what happens I guess.

Figure 3. Lantern Guys.....

Figure 4. Lantern Girls...

Ugh.... Lantern guys and girls....... what the hell kind of name is that. I think I read those somewhere on someone else's blog and the name stuck.

Well, yea.... that's about what we did the whole night. Eat, and then lanterns. The funny thing was, it wasn't only us going around the whole Desa Senadin and DPS area (the area around our housing area, that's what we call it). It's a funny and rare sight to see, when you walk around with lanterns and then you see some bobbing coloured lights far off the street, only to come close to each other and find out they're just some other kids, from curtin, and from Kota Kinabalu, Sabah, like us, haha.

I guess only KK people would do such funny things in other places.


Oh man.... I wanted to finish everything in this post. But looks like I'm running short of time and will have to delay things to a part 3. Didn't wanna give you guys a toooo long post, haha.


とまれ、

皆さん　ほんとにありがとう。　今度は楽しかったな。。。
この思い出が忘れないよ。　嬉しかったね。


That's all I guess, for now.

Till my next update. Later.